Self-internalizing *ish

So apparently the process of unburdening myself has led some to conclude that I’m weird…or rather..the workings of my mind are weird…sigh. I guess its back to self-internalizing *ish….which has some side effects.

There was a time when I kept all my issues, secrets, problems, joys and what not to myself. I’d talk to myself a lot (ok I still do…..must confess). Then came a point when I decided to try this trust thing…tried it..and liked it to the point of talking (or typing) myself hoarse..sigh. I guess coz I have this ability to listen to drama (ok mebe its coz I love drama.lols) that I tend to feel that it should be a two-way thing ama? Guess not….

Ever kept so much random stuff inside that it feels like you’re about to internally collapse? Kinda like a cake when you open the oven door too soon, ama a souffle that wasn’t made well….Whooomp! I feel myself collapsing in…

Rationally this mood can be explained…a bout of homesickness,,missing some people, bout of the flu,,,,dealing with random issues that arise oh so often…meh!

Moving on…got a string of interesting messages the other day….One from Mr. Proposal..apparently he’s moved on (good for him)..but with someone who is just like me..only shorter (eh what?) Yeah..I also don’t understand why he had to write and tell me that..the email contained other nonsense that myself and the beloveds couldn’t decipher so I moved swiftly past that…

Another email made me wonder about the friendships I have with certain people. I find it so funny (in an unfunny way) how people quickly develop amnesia..and forget the part they had to play in a rift…sigh. I’m tired of this whole break-up to make-up merry go round I have going on with some people…it needs to end soonest..

Now that’s off my chest..deepest breaths..back to the manicure..(painting the nails purple…so pretty..lol)

Playlist:

• So ambitious- Jay Z ft Pharrell
• Champagne Chronic Night Cap- Solange ft Lil Wayne
• Replacement Girl- Drake ft Trey Songz